January 6, 2020
draft stopper https://amzn.to/2uqc5aL
shoes https://amzn.to/2N0aH53
organizer https://amzn.to/2tz7Lpf
watch thingie https://amzn.to/2N0d1sK
watch case https://amzn.to/2N0kyaR
blah blah, amazon links, i make a tiny profit, testing to see if it makes a difference if they’re used from a private message or a blog post
Clothes Clothes Clothes – Tried and True + One Moneysaver
August 15, 2019It took a few years of over-packing, but I think I’ve finally got a good handle on packing clothes. Comfort, comfort, comfort. No more wasting time getting into Prom Princess Hitler on Roller Skates.
No more struggling with too long, over-full skirts (WHY DID I TAKE A HOOP SKIRT?? AN ACTUAL HOOP SKIRT.). I want to be comfortable and able to move as I please, from hopping on and off a bike to climbing a wild rotating boar. I have the same amount of fun if I’m wearing a Lewk or a wifebeater. So, from head-to-toe, here’s my musts:
Underwire can be a bit much, but I want some support and prettiness. This bralette is my absolute new favorite. I wasn’t expecting to like it, figured the cups would be too small and the support laughable. The cups are just big enough to cover and leave some cleavage. The support is surprisingly good. Not supportive, per se, but definitely provides perk.
Bralette with a little more coverage. I especially like the softness of the lining. You want to be nice to your skin out there.
Silk is great to go from day to night (layering is boss). Check out your local thrift store, it’s hard to find at reasonable prices – real, actual silk. I have a couple of tank tops I live in. It’s soft, dries fast from a cooler water soaking, stays fairly clean compared to other fabrics.
Underwear is important, cuz sometimes it’s all I’m wearing. It’s IMPOSSIBLE to find women’s underwear in black, 100% cotton, and for big butts. Enter these. They’re on the granny side, but don’t come over my belly button AND COVER MY ENTER ASS.
I bike more than walk, but sun and playa dust can wreak havoc on inner thighs. I got a pair of these for a trip last fall and was satisfied. Thick enough to preserve your modesty but thin enough to be comfortable. Way less hot than I expected, I didn’t notice I had them. They didn’t totally stay put around the knee but they didn’t ride up-ride up.
I need more than one pair for 2.5 weeks, though! These are SOFT AF, just the right length, comfortable waistband, looked fine under cut-offs and dresses.
If you’re not into black, get an assortment of patterns.
Nighttime, I don’t have many links because I have a motley assortment of wool and cashmere. Maybe if I could afford fancy new-fangled, cold-weather clothes I’d like them, but old-school wool and natural fabrics have served me well.
I will say: it’s all about layers. You’ll be freezing in camp, and pile on the clothes, but after a bike ride or a jaunt to the other side of Esplanade, you’re sweating.
These arm warmers are perfect for the dusk transitional period, especially as warm as it’s been the past few years. I’ve had mine for…at least six years.
Balaclavas are a hat, dust mask, and scarf in one. The one I have is WARM, though, so you might want to try a lighter option.
If you gotta have something shiny, don’t fall for the first FB ad you see (I’m looking at you, Dolls Kill). For example, you could pay $60 for this,
Or you could pay $10 for this.
Or $24 for a lammie pocket, so you don’t have to keep up with lanyard, and zippered pockets.
Nevermind! These cats did it for you.
August 6, 2019August 5, 2019
pillowcases https://amzn.to/31iuyRI
flask https://amzn.to/2YM5Lnm
lip gloss https://amzn.to/2TjF48r
charger https://amzn.to/2YQTGgS
bike lock https://amzn.to/2YQTLBc
goggles https://amzn.to/2YS3Pd3
legings https://amzn.to/2KpTSjf
Jaded Veteran’s Guide to What You Need: Wake Me Up Before I FOMO
August 2, 2019Morning
Wake up in the morning feelin’ like…you just slept for one hour, consumed gods-know-what all night long, and FOMO is kicking you out of bed. Or even better, you’ve got a volunteer shift to show up for.
- Hydrate: I fill up my camp bottle* when I go to bed so it’s ready to chug when I wake up. This OXO bottle rules because you can scoop powder into it without looking like Scarface afterwards. And, ICE! What powder? Vitalyte, of course. My first year I was miserably, physically thirsty until Thursday. I was drinking anything I could find – IRL I mostly drink water, coffee, and booze. Out there I was drinking Coke and other sodas (huge deal, I don’t drink them ever, never have in my life), flavored milks, ANYTHING I could get to try and stop being thirsty.
“Have you been taking electrolytes?”
…d’oh. This is a MUST. That first bottle of water of the day has a scoop, I take a scoop before bed, and whatever in-between. Vitalyte’s lemon is my favorite, but it’s hard to find these days.
Why Vitalyte and not one of the others? It’s only-what-you-need ingredients, invented by a chemist, mild flavor, instant dissolution (even in champagne), and the fact that it absorbs directly into your stomach lining.
If you’re going to mess with your keto diet during the burn, this is where to do it.
2. Morning Pills:
- Ibuprofen for inflammation aches, preventative measures, and handing out to people who will now owe you a favor.
- Naproxen Sodium for headaches, especially those induced by alcohol.
- Probiotics for pooping.
- Poop pills if you’re horribly clogged and have to do SOMETHING. Take two in the morning. Within 8 hours, relief. Trust me on this one. This is my miracle pill year-round (yay celiac’s). Can also take one before bed, to try and keep things flowing.
I used to take multi-vitamins, Emergen-C, B-12, etc. but I don’t take them in real life, so I don’t take them out there. If you plan on really…”partying,” then start your 5HTP prior to the event, it’s not a miracle day-after cure. It needs to build up. I really like this brand, and I’m almost positive their melatonin actually helps me get to sleep.
I have a pillbox like this one, organized by pain/sleep/energy/emergency. For bigger stuff like the probiotics me and Reggie Watts swear by, I just take the bottle and use it for whatever other vitamins/supplements. Can be a pain shaking it all out to get to what you need, but saves space/trash bottles.
If you need to travel with pills, these cookies are totes adorbz and super great gifts.
Also, Plan B.
Eyeballs: Ok, now that you’ve chugged some Vitalyte water, taken your meds, moisten them eyeballs. Perfect time to lay back down and question your life choices.
Theoretically, single-use is best; remains the most sterilized. Also great to have on you as you go about your day. PRO TIP: DON’T USE THEM IN A DUST STORM IN A PORTOJOHN. I’ll explain later. (I’m not going to explain later, just trust me.)
I’m vain so I like to do Visine for redness (also works if you have blooming pimples, to lessen the redness of your skin) then moisture stuff. Post-LASIK we tried EVERYthing, and this was our favorite. I used to try the overnight stuff, it’s basically just vasoline. If you’ve already got dry eyes IRL, you might want to try it. Everyone is different, of course, and there’s a lot of variables determining how your skin, nasal passages, nail beds, and eyes will react to the desert. Better safe than sorry applies no where more than it does at Burning Man.
3. Face: Everyone has a thing that just makes them feel better. For me, it’s washing my face. Water and soap. This routine probably isn’t for people with dry skin and/or who don’t have to worry about acne.
- My holy grail face soap
- Korean scrubbie
- towel to keep soapy water from hitting the dust, a must-have when I did contacts, to catch the saline
- towel to dry my face – If you haven’t used these “camp towels” before, it’s weird. Trick is you don’t use it like a normal towel, rubbing and buffing. You wipe yourself dry. Also useful for catching spills, but not as thick as the Sham Wow. Hang INSIDE your tent to dry or it will be useless!
- Face sunscreen – Yeah, it’s expensive. But crying in my tent because I have a big zit on the way costs more. For years I used Elta MD. I switched to Nia 24. I think it might make my skin look better…not quite as greasy as the Elta (which would be a downside, for some).
- Tattoo sunscreen – The tube I’ve got is almost gone. I’ll probably switch to a straight-up zinc stick, maybe?
- Rest of me sunscreen – Natural, poisonous, cream, spray, stick: I’ve tried them all (except expensive fancy ones, like Super Goop, which I’m dying to try!). This keeps being my favorite. Neutrogena gets second place, too. Sunscreen is difficult for me because I don’t like lotion and feeling greasy. But hoo-boy, you think you burn easily…wait til you get to the desert. After the first grease-up of the day, keep a smaller size on you to touch up as needed.
- Weleda Skin Food for any spots that still feel dry, after slathering on the lotions. I was using Nivea and whatever other thick creams I could find on sale. Then I found Skin Food on sale. Insanely worth the cost. Pat it under my eyes several times a day/night and apply as needed elsewhere.
Now that you’ve taken care of your flesh and bones, it’s time to eat!
And of course by eat, I mean drink coffee until you vibrate.
- Boil water – this Jetboil is all we take, no more stove.
- Add instant coffee – I am a coffee snob, die-hard French presser, but eff that noise out there
- Or instant Thai tea
Or add the Thai tea packet to your coffee! Works like creamer and sugar in one. Half/half is one of my cooler items, if you know a powdered/non-cooler creamer that’s GOOD (not Coffee Mate, not powdered milk), please let me know!
Y’all know I love my collapsible drinking vessels. Nalgenes are stupid. Camelbaks are stupid. One exception:
Why? Spill-proof. Keeps hot hot and cold cold without burning your hand or dripping condensation anywhere. Cork-lined handle is comfortable and fits a carabiner. Ooooooooooooh snap, now they have purple!!
Until recently I just wanted hot coffee in the morning, no matter how hot the air was. I don’t know. Just did. Thankfully a camp mate brought a bottle of Stok’s, and I learned how amazing iced coffee can be. I can go through one bottle myself while I get ready.
Another awesome cold treat, any time of day, is espresso coconut water.
NOT THIS ONE. Though try them all, see which one you like best. Me, Coco Cafe is the best. Coming back to camp after riding around or volunteering all day, one of these cold out the cooler is just….just a real treat. They’re often on-sale at the grocery store, and I’d buy whenever they were and save them up.
Lastly, brush your teeth. MOOP-free with these toothpaste “nuts” and a box you can burn. Spitting into a water bottle/mason jar can get gross. Spit out onto these, and burn them.
Side note, I was super anti-Wisps, the disposable travel toothbrushes until a surprise vomit incident. The people I was visiting handed me one and it was the most amazing feeling in the worrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrlduh. So, if you’re prone to vomit or away from your toothbrush, consider killing the planet a little more with these things. Give it a second to activate the toothpaste/soften the bristles.
So, to sum up my morning routine: hydrate, medicate, moisturize, clean and sunscreen, caffeinate.
Previously:
Jaded Veteran’s Guide to What You Need to Survive Burning Man, and Maybe Even Have Some Fun: Personal Care
Ziploc bags, a burner’s best friend
May 13, 2019*lost draft from 2016, I don’t know what I was going to write about but the title is true fax
Quote of the Day
May 13, 2019*another lost draft, from 2011, RE Zach Galifinakis
About one of my all-time favorite people (that I’ve never met and are sort of fictional in that way).
“…his lack of fear comes from a sharp sense that no one is better than anyone else. ‘I wouldn’t overthink it, though,’ Blancha adds. ‘There’s a good portion of plain old redneck in there too.’