Ziploc bags, a burner’s best friend

May 13, 2019

*lost draft from 2016, I don’t know what I was going to write about but the title is true fax

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Quote of the Day

May 13, 2019

*another lost draft, from 2011, RE Zach Galifinakis

About one of my all-time favorite people (that I’ve never met and are sort of fictional in that way).

“…his lack of fear comes from a sharp sense that no one is better than anyone else. ‘I wouldn’t overthink it, though,’ Blancha adds. ‘There’s a good portion of plain old redneck in there too.’

Read more: http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,2072446,00.html#ixzz1MvKXYadl.

May 13, 2019

Darn it, Amazon.com

May 13, 2019

*I just discovered I have a long “drafts” list. This is one of them, from 2011, I have no idea what it was going to be about.

Burning Man is the loneliest place

May 13, 2019

Tres Latin mini pupusas

May 13, 2019

*let’s file this under “drunk drafts I didn’t even know were here

 

Apparently I can’t remember the login stuff for the GF blog I tried to have, 10 years ago when nobody cared, so here I am.

Great show at Star Bar. LeavingwhenstaffsaysGTFOgreat. I’ve been drinking. I need a snack. I know if I get home, and there is nothing crunchy and….other things, not exactly sure what I want, I will be sad.

Kroger’s on the way home, I’ll pop in and grab something. I had to wander. I didn’t know exactly what I wanted. I figured something in the freezer section would grab me, something to throw in the microwave and crisp on, fall asleep, regret is for tomorrow.

 

Nothing grabbed me, though. It was all gross, and/or gluteny. Then I noticed the hippie part, “Oh! Those freezers! Something there”! Dumb, dumb, everything is dumb, MINI JALAPENO SOMETHING SHITS! yay! perfect. pupusas are god’s manna.

 

No microwave. Pot. Oil. Takes forever, not 2 minutes. hot on one side, cold on the other. 1 bag, one serving. I added cheese. Basic flavor is like…like they scientifically flavored it. corn. corn meal. pupusa. the odd bite had a punch of jalapeno, but over all….I don’t get the point. One pupusa would’ve been about he same, if not better for a bigger concentration of stuffing. Once the fry finally got going, and I poked at them, I got the nice mild crisp on the outside, inside was melted (there wasn’t much on the inside) and I am definitely satisfied with my late night snack…..but still. A pupusa would’ve been just as great, probably better for the even cooking.

Jaded Veteran’s Guide to What You Need to Survive Burning Man, and Maybe Even Have Some Fun: Personal Care

May 13, 2019

Note: Amazon is evil and must be punished. However, before their amoral employee practices were brought to light, they were my go-to for burn supplies. The embedded links are “affiliate” links, so if you end up buying something from my link, I might make like, $00.005! YEET! (note: still not sure what yeet means.)

In the 10+ years I’ve been going to Burning Man and regionals I’ve acquired extensive experience with gear. I know what I thought I needed, what I need, and what I don’t need. My suggestions, over the years, have been embraced by virgins and veterans alike.

Number one recommend of ALL TIME: Pstyle. If you are someone who needs to pee standing up, you need a Pstyle. Not a She-Wee. Not a GoGirl. You need and want a Pstyle.

pstyle

You want at least two, really. One to keep on you at all times, and one to keep in the tent for when you lose the other one. It’s the easiest to use, the most discrete, it’s a women-owned and run company and as you can see, not just marketed to cis women.

pstyle 3

It shakes clean and dries instantly (except for if there’s a lot of thicker blood). Stick it in your pocket. Stick it in one of their cute-azz Pstyle carrying cases.

pstyle case

It’s a game-changer, a life-changer, and great for dive bars with no toilet seats, road trips, and just about anything you do that involves emptying your bladder. I’ve been using it for almost 10 years!

pstyle 4

My search for a way to pee that didn’t involve sitting was inspired by the L Word and, thanks to Pstyle, didn’t end up involving catheters.  Sadly it looks like the Pstyle song isn’t online anymore! It was riot grrl realness.

Runner-up: Freshette. Freshette was my first pee funnel and it does have advantages. First, the way it forms a seal and does more to prevent over-flowing (which I’ve only done twice, with a Pstyle, because I wasn’t paying attention). Second, the tubing is nice for directing the stream away, but then you have a second piece to deal with and it’s not as easy to clean as the Pstyle. I lost the tube, but keep the pink part in my tent; it’s perfect for the pee jug. Speaking of, learn from my mistakes and pee-covered tent floor. Get a big container with a handle for your pee jug!

I recommend this water, or an Arizona tea jug.

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Not a little Gatorade bottle, not a coffee can, something with a lid for when it’s not in use (again, please learn from my mistakes!) and a handle to make it easy to carry and empty. If the idea of being seen with a bottle of pee is keeping you from using one, or emptying it properly, decorate it.

Now, onto the rest! I’m going to go in order of your day, from waking up to going to sleep.

Ah, eyeballs. To use mine properly I needed contacts. Which meant clean hands and saline, all liquidy and drippy-droppy. I came up with a little contacts corner, where I kept wipes to initially clean my fingers and a bottle of saline to rinse again, before touching my eyeballs. Sham Wow made it easy. It absorbed the saline instantly, keeping the tent floor dry. It dried quickly, no damp cloths lying around, caking up with playa dust. This also meant I could keep the contacts case nice and clean, rinsing and adding fresh saline every time (just dumping the used saline onto the Sham Wow).

Sham Wows ended up being fairly handy for things like the aforementioned pee jug incident (ok, ok, incidentS, lessons learned and re-learned). I’ve had the same two or three for years, now (I don’t know where they came from). They wash clean and are good to go again and again.

Baby Wipes: For my first two or three years, I didn’t use baby wipes. So MOOPy. Smelly. Don’t they leave a sticky film/gross feeling?

Also, I’m not a baby.  Please click on that; I can’t embed Tweets.

Then one year, my campmate offered me one from his cooler. It was magical. So get you some wipes. Use them to clean yourself, your gear, blow your nose, clean the inside of your nose, etc.

I go barefoot indiscriminately. Again, around year 2 or 3, I learned me some lessons. Playa dust will do things to your skin you didn’t know possible. It’s a point of pride to look as dusted as possible. If you look clean, you clearly aren’t doing it right.

However. After a particularly bad year of skin so dry it’d beat Norm McDonald in a stand-up competition, I began a skin care routine that has served me well.

  1. Moisturize. Non-stop. Cuticles and inside your nose, especially. Swipe a Q-tip through some Vasoline and get up in there. I’ve found the new cocoa butter flavor to be pleasant.

Listen, people joke about playa dust, it’s considered that thing you just have to learn to love, but it is not good for your body. It is not good for the inside or the outside.

dustWhy Do We Act As If Playa Dust is Safe?

It’s not sand, it’s not dust, it’s a bunch of chemicals that will, scientifically speaking, fuck your shit up. 

After being in sandals all day, I thoroughly clean and moisturize my feet before putting on boots and socks. I also clean any skin that’s going into tighter clothing. Most days, especially as warm as nights have been the past several years, I don’t change into warmer clothes. If I do swap from shorts into leggings, I clean the skin to prevent chemical burns. Nivea cream, or anything with all the heavy moisturizing ingredients, works well. When I take boots and socks off for bed, I probably clean again, depending on how uh…”tired” I am, slather on more cream, and sleep in cheap little socks. 

Sleeping in socks – sleeping in anything – is gross. Not as gross as sitting in a hotel room, crying, because your feet and hands are splintered, red, bleeding, and burnt.

I try to do a pretty good wipe down, before bed, to keep the bed cleaner. For….at least five years I’ve had the same queen-sized air mattress from ALPS.  It’s comfortable, holds air well, the rechargeable pump has never died on me, during the event. The reverse air-sucking means it will fold up tight. Sleep is SO important to me. I can’t nap, so when I’m down, I want to stay down and sleep well. Having a foam top the last few years has been bougie and beautiful. My burn bed is so comfortable it’s hard to leave.

BACK TO SKIN

IT PUTS THE LOTION ON

Contacts in, skin wiped and slathered, sunscreen time!

The sun at Burning Man is RELENTLESS. Put it on, and never take it off. If you pass a table with sunscreen, spray some on. I don’t care if you just left camp. Spray, squirt, rubbidy dub. This is the one time of year I splurge on fancy sunscreen, both by Neutrogena.

Usually I hate scented stuff, but I like this one. 

6887274-pizza

Yes, I’m aware that it’s putting on enough and putting it on often that does the trick, SPF numbers are fairly meaningless. I don’t care. The desert is trying to kill me and I’ve never gotten a sunburn when I use this.

To super protect my tattoos I keep the 100 on me.

71cs8H84YiL._SL1500_

They both go on evenly, dry quickly, and don’t leave me feeling like a greased pig.

mn-weird_state_laws

Boobs, sweat, Burning Man

August 15, 2016

A dear readers asks: “Gonna get personal here. Did you ever go topless at Burning Man? Did you have problems from boob sweat + playa?”

I couldn’t recall any sort of issue, so I asked friends. Overwhelming consensus is that since it’s so dry out there, boob sweat isn’t an issue. Here in the South, most of the year we’re getting hugged by a REALLY sweaty person who won’t let go. You can sit still under the shade with a fan, and you’re still gonna be wet from the  humidity.

Second overwhelming response is to use deodorant, to prevent sweating and chafing under the breasts, in the groin area, etc.  Pretty much the same ingredients as Monistat and other anti-chafing products, just without the targeted marketing and pink tax.

I’m basically a Pstyle missionary.  I keep one on me, one in my tent next to the peejug. I consider it a “must-have” for Burning Man, other burns, gross music venues with no toilet seats, outfits that I don’t want to remove completely so I can pee, etc.

She asks, “What do you do with pstyle while it’s in your bag? Put it in a ziplock? Does it get gross?”

The belt I made has a zipper pocket just for the Pstyle. Many women keep it in a ziplock bag with wet wipes. I don’t, just shake after use, it dries instantly, the end. It’s never gotten gross – when I’m menstruating the blood might need to get wiped off, doesn’t always shake right off like urine, but that’s about it. Doesn’t smell, doesn’t make the fabric of the pockets it’s in smell. The most likely thing to end up smelling is your peejug.

I have overflowed the Pstyle when I didn’t have it placed correctly and/or wasn’t paying attention. Practice in the shower, over your toilet at home, off your back deck, until you figure out where it needs to go against your body and how you need to stand. I have also definitely overflowed my peejug, so keep it empty. I’ve also  knocked it over, so keep the lid screwed on at all times!!

I recommend this water bottle for a peejug:

crystal-geyser-1-gallon-natural-spring-bottled-water-6-case

The paper handle is very nice for the emptying trips. I also like to paint it, cover it with duct tape, etc. so it’s not like, totally obvious you’re carrying around a bunch of pee.

DON’T USE JUGS THAT HELD JUICE OR ANYTHING OTHER THAN WATER. That is a guaranteed odor.

Space bags STILL SUCK.

August 10, 2016

I’ve posted enough about trying them out. The ones you vacuum can shrink stuff, into a brick that may make packing more difficult. But then once you’re there, who’s got a vaccum? My friends are trying it anyways, claiming their air mattress pump will work.

Checkout line impulse, Swiss Gear ones. More expensive, “name brand,” maybe they’ll be useful this time. 

Misc. clothes (ie not total outfits that can go in their own ziploc bag):

On the left, a plastic zipper bag that probably sheets came in. Right, the empty space bag. Transferred – the sliding closer clip came off before I’d even opened it (per usual). I filled it with the clothes, smushed it below the fill line, went to roll, POP! Well, too much stuff. Halved it, made it nice and flat. Started to roll, POP! Took everything out but a skirt and bikini top, made sure to squeeze excess air out before rolling, started rolling, POP!

They’re just thicker ziploc bags with a useless plastic sliding tab. How did you get it to work? What do you use to compress stuff for packing? I’d use a compression bag but the plastic keeps stuff clean, and the see-through means less rummaging, which also means keeping it cleaner…

BRC PO

August 9, 2016
I’m not finding any info on what can’t be mailed to BRC PO…which seems odd. Not even a “don’t Prime us, assholes!” update, in these years of Amazon. 
One year my campmate had fresh chocolate covered strawberries delivered.
 
Mail is a beautiful thing, just the smallest postcard is special. Everything I ever got is hanging on the wall or in my burn box. If you want to surprise someone the format is:
 
name: doom
camp name and address: Stag Camp 815&D
anything else potentially helpful: (in the monkey hut with Ghini)*
Black Rock City NV 89412-0149 (this is the same for everyone)
 
*delivering mail is AWESOME, I recommend everybody do it. No official sign up, just swing by the PO around Center Camp, tell them where you’re headed, and they’ll give you what they have along that area.
 
Descriptors can help because shit gets packed in there, several times I was at the right camp and right address but nobody knew the person on the envelope.