I finally unpacked from Burning Man a couple of weeks ago, found all the journals I tried to keep. Don’t really want to read them…can’t remember anything good going into them. But hey, it is a blog about going to Burning Man, and I went, and so…I guess  I will.

(in no particular order)

No where to park in Salt Lake City for Whole Foods, so we found a place somewhere and walked to Noodles Co. Pretty good. Really tired of stopping. Ready to be there and get to work. Feelin’ cranky. Think it is a combo of pain, dehydration and claustrophobia. Actually sleep well, when I do.  Get travel sunscreen.

Drove through  Wyoming, it’s gorgeous. Never seen anywhere so unpopulated for so long (as in, mile after mile). Gradually turns into a flat prarie to plateaus and hills to…Utah! “Shaped like this,” Chaney slanted his hand uphill.

DuffDuff wanted to get in touch with a friend. I said, “WE ARE THE ONLY FRIENDS YOU NEED” and Rana said, “We’re turning into the Donner party.” Pee funnel, shorts, pants, tank, hoodie (items listed as such are notes to pack next time)

Nebraska was the first place we stopped where I felt, “I’ve traveled. I’m somewhere else.” But I can’t describe why.

I got some pajamas to lounge more comfortably in a KMart somewhere

“Redneck clown whore.”

“It’s not like ‘whore’ is bad.”

Will-call sux. Pay xtra for no wait. So dusty…hot. I’m sweating, contrary to prior reports. Dust everywhere, settling on everything everywhere, my face, my laptop in a bag…sloooow procession in. Can’t walk along side your vehicle.

Mon evening

I am not having fun. This is dusty, filthy. The wind doesn’t stop. You do sweat. I feel like throwing up (I did. To the point I was actually scared, having never thrown up so much that I can recall.) I sat naked in the middle of the dome, trying to figure what I need, to feel better. Besides a shower, tasty meal and two-hour massage (seriously. fingerips to head. sore.) Crusty nose full of boogers. Want to bathe with wipes and change, but don’t know how cold it’ll be. Just wish the wind would stop. I feel disorientated. Tired of water. Want headache and stuffiness to end. Know such wonderous things are happening right outside, but I want to lie down and cry.


Wow. That was a lot of vomit. Huge (three or four when it was all over) bag full of…carrot juice, pineapple…second bag was bile. Green. It choked me…then there was just nothing left.  Salt. Eat. Hydrate. Home for the night. So much vomit. Until my muscles ached. Tunna force-fed me GORP and I tried an EmergenC. = vomit. But had started feeling better as I ate, so decided I needed miso. Everyone when they found out I was sick said, “Salt?” I brought no electrolytes. 😦

It’d be really neat to be in a RV ona laptop, blogging! (as in typing, not internetting, I have a hard time writing because my hands can’t write fast enough) I definitely see the appeal, now. So. So. Dusty! My poor hair! I didn’t expect it to be so imminent upon arrival! Don’t like a lot of things – most of them revolving around me not being as self-reliant as I’m used to. After the miso, some water and no vomit. I decided to venture out. I feel like I’m at a burn. Not feeling any sort of cosmic enlightenment. But the dedication and work people do in this dust is amazing. Feeling so grimy is bothering me waaaaay more than I thought it would. Like without pretty hair ‘n shit I don’t know. Let’s see…rode around with Ryan! All over the place. It is HUGE. I mean…huge. Even he said, when we finally found PEX, “It all looks so much smaller from the top of the car…”

And I still have 7 days. Hopefully I’ll sleep. I’m right by a generator, which will hopefully serve as white noise. The noise level is def higher than I’m used to – well, or it isn’t as escapable. Some of the art cars are just am – no, mindboggling.

I’m worried my mattress has a leak. Already thinking of next year! I really still think I’d rather do a bunch of regionals. This was so much $. Or 4th of Juplaya. Skip the frat boys and ravers – and they are here! I have absolutely, not even close to an idea of what time it is. Time for bed and a snack!

Oh, and the weather is gorgeous – well, tonight. Socks, boots, leggins, tank dress, good. Perfect night weather. Met a – well, sat next to a Canadian on the ship. He’s gluten-free and had the same mask I do. Weird! I slung my legs around to hang off the side and he followed suite excitedly. “You’re kind of a genius, eh?”

Ha! He called me a genius AND said eh! Loving the temp. Hope tomorrow is less damn dusty. Troy and I couldn’t do camp dinner because the stove wouldn’t light. And I was puking. Like carrot juice for pee bottle, it isn’t obvious.

Wonder about Depends, for real. Pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to pee in bed and keep sleeping, though. How burnable are they? Just saying, for those who have to pee often, this (getting up and dealing with funnels/bottles/etc.) is a pain.

Camelback=suck, keep a bottle for drinking at camp.

Washed my face with a wipe, it is stinging. Odd.

Constant nose blowing = more kleenex. Paper towels would be handy too. Tomorrow I’ll see how Issa and Josh plan for their grey water.

Tues morn

Slept great! Gonna find the time and set my clock.

wow it’s 940am!


nose spray (I lost mine that Monday night, grr)


Sat sunset

In the tent. First bad dust storm. Rode across the playa with Ben and Brody, could not see. Eyes burn – my left one actually wouldn’t even open.  Feel very safe and wind-free in my dome, yay! Trying to tidy up and pack. Fear DoD (Day of the Dead) makeup will be pointless in this dust. Still no sign of the nasal spray. Annoyed with people leaving food.

Pack it in.

Pack it OUT.

You put it there, YOU remove it. How hard is that? I’ve done my best to throw my trash in my trash can. Self-reliance. Do I take this shit too seriously? Should I just leave food lying around, bring lots of unnecessary packing and then use community trash? One half (drawing of this)  = good enough shower w/ hair washing. This has been so lonely. I’ve made no new friends, much less fallen in love. Friday night gave up @ 1 a.m., came home for an Ambien. It was such a fucking rave.

So many fucked up people. I’m coming to learn I did have expectations, after all.

 – no mind-blowing art

– no mind-blowing or new music

Did see a wonderful drag performance. White Rabbit cover, his bustle was a basket, white skittles = pills, cornrow mohawk, huge lashes…the Rocket Ship was really cool. The night dust was not. Walked on glass! Wish I was in someone else’s tent for this storm. My eyes! So dry and scratchy and dusty.

Today I finally stopped being thirsty. Watching this dome flap is something. I poked my head out and could barely see the kitchen two feet away. Oh, trying to find Brody after


walking the temple** ( and Putt Putt!) got stopped and ahd to drink Jager to pass. He also gave me H2O (my camelback is leaking). Today I have the worst farts. AUGH MY EYES :””””'(.

It really is something, this dust. No, you didn’t shit ourself, your ass is dusty!”

“I wouldn’t want to eat this in a combat situation.” – Chaney on his refried beans MRE. I want to say fuck it and head out! Maybe a little more – no, no more me time! I’m tired of walking biking experiencing ALONE 😦 Brody had some delicious pulled pork with goat cheese. I had pinders, moonshine and kimchee – apparently pinders are not a West Coast thing. And tritip is not a Southern thing. I wish I knew if this wind is stopping so I could dress. Do the people in Gerlach experience it, or is it just on the open playa? I miss trees and grass. And humidity! I miss humidity! I miss humidity?!? Stuck my head out again, it isn’t letting up. Think I’ll go ninja (leggins, no costuming) and go out. Gas mask and goggles.

The while out was nuts. Blinding.

Anyways. Burn.

I walked and walked looking – AGAIN – for somebody, something, anything. Shoulda gone to B&B (I should have gone and sat with Ben and Brody at his art piece) but had been told I should “be in it.” I was walking away when it started. I had to pee. I was crying. My back to it my brain turned to symbolism so maybe I’m not a burner. Another failed attempt at trying to find somewhere to belong. I just end up alone, again. Fuck Alchemy (coming up a couple of weeks after BM), all of it. Why do I leave my house? 30,000 people and I can’t find anywhere to go. My feet ache with exhausted hope.

Burning Man is just a big fucking rave. All you hear is techno. People FUCKED up wandering around. One DJ plugged his new album at Hookah Dome. At least when the mushrooms kick in I forget I’m alone.

Chafed from the backpack, crinoline and fabric. The skull thing worked out. Eyes burn. God, when I think how much MONEY this has cost me. I have no idea if I’m glad I did it or not.

I can’t fucking wait to LEAVE.

Guess that answers that.


Sunday was good.

Heart (Tunna and I rode out a dust storm in it)

spinach (some guy had a big can of spinach and I ate it)

blue sky (out the side of the heart, thick white dust storm, out of the top ventricle, clear, blue, beautiful sky)

sausages (at Poly Paradise)

Lunch Money (I um, ground scored it)


 fans with Tunna

Temple tears (for my grandmother, cat, and sorrow that it was ending)

mouse chase (anybody lucky enough to be sitting nearby to see it, you know what I’m talking about!)

Charlie Brown Christmas

vodka and Orangina


DPW noise


Packed a little.

Parachuting stars

The blue balloons are bikes riding all over

DPW = HOT. Hot cars, hot boys. Cool bustle corset coats.

Not happy @ wasted food. All the breads molded in the bags. Didn’t cover the bed, and it was OK. Dust is coating everything. Sleep!


(in front)


Exodus is a slow crawl.

Chips, salsa, margaritas, turkey, cheese.

“You’re leadking retard. Put a plug in it.”

“Down in front or I’ll kick you in the cunt.”

We’re just driving. No music or movies. “BM is a 360 degree party and everything you want to go to is 1/2 a mile away.”

A chick in a big mascot head from the Muppets just walked by.

Exodus is such a waste of time.

Remember how dirty you are. Packing up meant dust flying. Have drinks and snacks for Exodus. “I’m not sure it’s worse than Atlanta traffic, though,” I quipped. Troy chuckled tiredly. This trip costs so much time and money. I know if it was a shorter trip I’d enjoy it more. We’ve cramped trash bags, occupying four seats space. Tunna’s asleep at my feet, everyone’s quiet. Sated from the initial excitement and

carrots and dip and chips and salsa. Karissa’s reading and biting her thumbnail. Troy naps between spurts of advancement. Small, small spurts of advancement. The dust chockes you (AC probably isn’t helping). The amount of RVs is nuts. I really wish I’d made it back in the 90s.


Texted Scratch about pee contest, “You lead a glamourous life, honey.” Passed Shaft(?), Utah. Desolate. Not even gas stations. I have to pee so very bad. I think my body is just rebelling against using a pee funnel. NO MORE it stomps it’s foot. Much more unpopulated than Wyoming, for sure. At least they had cows. Enjoy

and there this book ends. But here’s some more pictures:

You can see more of K’s paper balls of DOOM! – giantess ones! in action at Alchemy here.


*Succintly put: I lost my grandmother in the spring – found out she had taken a turn for the worst in the middle of a field, at a burn. Nearly didn’t go to Burning Man, because my other grandmother fell ill right before. Both of them are as Christian and Baptist and religious as can be, and I love them dearly, and they loved me.

**I did make new friends, from Florida – had actually noticed them back in March, at Preheat in Florida. They are as fun and sweet as they are good-looking.

Even for a raver. 🙂

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2 Responses to “”

  1. Wow. « I’m going to Burning Man. Says:

    […] more amusing, my neighbors with whom I spent a lovely afternoon will be there, […]

  2. Someone just had another one of my BRILLIANT ideas… « I’m going to Burning Man. Says:

    […] Looking for a link to Tunna brought up all sorts of fun posts about what a GREAT time I had my first year! […]

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