Dogsbane B&B of DOOM!

So SantaCon was fun.

Even Santa was in the Xmas spirit, checking his email and twittering or whatever, all at once!

I even got a Christmas present! Though I don’t care much for martinis, tequila and grapefruit juice serves just as well.

Dorothy Parker has long been a hero(ine) of mine – Resume is one of the first poems I ever memorized, courtesy of XJ Kennedy (and my dad’s library), circa 5th grade.

Though there’s a plethora of anecdotes (walking up a mountain singing Amanda Palmer with Shiva), I just don’t think tall tales of “…and then Santa fell out of the driver’s seat and vomited behind the tree” will translate well without more photos and a lot of wordsmithing on my part.

So here’s my awesome trash can.

And Cha-Cha:

Tulle Cat: Basement Cat’s personal stylist

Notice my lovely cross-stitch, if you will.

I had a VISITOR! A house guest! It was awesome! My gluten-free Morrissey sister. I made pizza for dinner Friday night – what you can’t see in the pictures

 is the cheese/spinach/cheese/tomatos, onion, garlic, mushroom/cheese layery goodness.

It was awesome. So was all the beer. And the fact she packed her bathrobe.

Saturday morning we woke up and realized there was no champagne in the house. Off to the likker store!

Like the fancy lady I am. We literally woke up, put on enough clothes to stay out of jail, and walked out the door.

I do own a hair brush. I think it is in the bathroom somewhere.

Two bottles of champagne and four bottles of Green’s later,

we were back in our robes, toasting our gluten-free egg and maple wafflewiches

They were alright. Needed something. More cheese. Syrup.

Bacon. We weren’t sated. So I made breakfast tacos.


Leftover pizza toppings (tomato, garlic, onion, mushrooms)




Almost done.

Looks much better assembled!

Needless to say, a long nap soon followed. We needed to rest up for dinner.

Bacon and beer. The end. Just kidding.

Beet and goat cheese salad is the new awesome. Cheese plate, potato leek soup and dates stuffed with gorgonzola fried in bacon.

Baked creamy sour cream cheese onion schnitzelhasenpfeffer

What? Did someone say bacon?

Here’s some bacon porn, enjoy.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand food coma:

Dessert? JUCIFER.

Jucifer. JUCIFER.

Jucifer is a religious experience, I swear.  Everytime I see them, it’s magick. Google if you want, nothing you’ll find will capture hearing it (and seeing her) live.

It was a good night.

Sunday morning was calm,

and over too soon as Miz Nummy had to roll back to ATL *insert sobbing sounds*.

Sunday night, though, I helped Juanita Superstar decorate their tree.

Our collaborative efforts (my blinking poinsetta, his Cosmo ornament) resulted in this stunning tree topper:

I then took snapshots for his Christmas card…which I can’t post here. Large naked hairy man with his penis in a Mr. Potato Santa.

The end. Ohnowait, light up Christmas dinosaurs.

Now you can stop reading.


3 Responses to “Dogsbane B&B of DOOM!”

  1. Wherein I try to make a real blog post « I’m going to Burning Man. Says:

    […] and I and my GF and Morrissey sister have been planning food and boozes all week. “You know we’re only there a couple of […]

  2. Liason du Enuui Says:

    […] You may remember them (no, you don’t. nobody reads this blog.) from past events. […]

  3. Wherein I bitch and moan « I’m going to Burning Man. Says:

    […] saw what I wore. Mismatched, hobbled together as usual, somehow turning out quite well! Asheville SantaCon is a MARATHON. I hope to find my !@#$% camera cord soon so I can get my […]

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